The Dual Sting of Depression and Anxiety – Involuntary Defeat Strategy (IDS)
For anyone who has ever felt the dual sting of both depression and anxiety, you know that there is a link between the two in many instances. It makes sense that, if an individual has experienced the rejection and defeat that contributes to depression, they will ultimately experience anxiety in regards to confronting the sources of that depression.
Read More »3 Tips to Beat Depression and Improve Life Satisfaction
Your life satisfaction can affect every aspect of your life – how you approach things, how you interact with others, how much you enjoy anything you do and so much more. When you are not satisfied with your life, research has shown that you are more susceptible to depression, an often debilitating disease whose tentacles can have far-reaching and detrimental effects on your well-being. The lower your life satisfaction, the higher risk you have of depression. Likewise, if you suffer from depression, you are more likely to feel dissatisfaction with your life.
Read More »Combat Depression – Beating Negative Thought Patterns During The Winter Months
The winter months are often a terribly depressing time for Canadians. The lack of sunshine alone can lead to decreased energy levels, a loss of interest in daily activities and the need for additional sleep.
But what if you’re still feeling depressed once spring arrives and the warm weather and sunshine beckons you outdoors?
Although we may casually refer to “feeling depressed” during a momentary unhappy time in our life, individuals who suffer from prolonged depression feel sad and empty to the point that their feelings impair their day-to-day activities and interactions with other people.
In 2002, Statistics Canada reported that approximately 8% of adult Canadians experience a major depression at some point in their lives. Depression and anxiety continues to be Canada’s fastest-rising diagnosis. From 1994 to 2004, the number of visits made by Canadians to office-based doctors for depression and anxiety almost doubled-a staggering 11.6 million people in 2003.
And while medication may be necessary in cases of clinical depression, it needn’t be your first line of defense if your altered mood is a result of a variety of negative experiences you’ve suffered in your day-to-day life and you find yourself in a downward spiral.
Sure, if you’re looking for a quick fix, antidepressants may work in the short term. But if you’d like to make a significant long-lasting change in your life, you have to be willing to make a significant long-lasting change in you the way you think- changing negative thought patterns into positive ones.
It’s been my observation that depression and low self-esteem go hand-in-hand. People with high self esteem feel confident about themselves and have positive thought patterns; whereas those who suffer from low self esteem often experience feelings of shame, guilt or self-doubt-negative thought patterns.
Most of my clients come to me at a time of depression. They’ve felt lost, lonely, abandoned and neglected for most of their life. As a life coach, I believe in self-awareness and emotional intelligence. What does this have to do with depression? Well, before you can change your negative thought patterns, you need to learn who you are. To do this, I work with each of my clients and explore their behaviours-both positive and negative. Through this process we learn who they are: their values, strengths, weaknesses, likes and dislikes. And then we use that information to set goals.
One depression-fighting strategy I encourage my clients to adopt is a regular exercise routine. Medically proven to boost your mood and lower rates of depression, exercise removes the buildup of stress hormones in the body, allowing you to sleep and concentrate better. When you exercise, your body produces endorphins, or feel-good chemicals, and leaves you feeling happier even after you’ve stopped. And with more oxygen flowing through your red blood cells, you become more receptive to new ideas and ready to take on more challenges.
In addition, maintaining a regular exercise routine provides a structure and focus in your life as you set and meet new goals. The accomplishment of these goals-no matter how big or how small-leads to a sense of achievement and improved self-confidence and self-esteem.
Using exercise as a way to combat depression is not a new strategy, nor is it the only method you’ll need to employ in your journey to better mental health. But making exercise a priority in your life will bring you one step closer to the ultimate goal of a healthy mind, body and soul.
Learn to overcome negative thought patterns using exercise. Visit Bruno LoGreco master life coach author and motivational speaker today to start feeling better tomorrow.
I am what I believe…
Not too long ago I met a young lady. She was in her early 20’s. Her demeanor was timid and shy, unsure of herself and angry. She was diagnosed with ODD (oppositional defiance disorder), depression and social anxiety. She also struggled with learning skills and experienced stress coping with day-to-day pressure.
The first day I met her it was obvious to me that the girl sitting in front of me was lost and did not have an identity. When I asked her to tell me a bit about herself she listed all the labels she identified with and one of them was ‘stupid.” She went on to tell me everything she couldn’t do because of her learning disability. I asked her to tell me which medication she took or had been taking. The list included: Wellbutrin, abilify, effexor, lamictal, paxil, and xanax. She went on to tell me that at one point she was taking 5 of the 6 medications, daily. I also noticed a slight tremor during the assessment.
My first step was to destroy the labels she identified with and to illustrate the limiting beliefs and the self imposed expectations at the root of her guiding principles.
The first belief to get destroyed was “I’m a failure.” It wasn’t difficult to prove the opposite. Simply by asking her to list her accomplishments she realized she wasn’t as big of a failure as she wanted to believe. In fact after the exercise she discovered she experienced very little to no failure. The shift came after she realized success doesn’t mean perfection.
The second step was to destroy her impulsive need to prove herself for validation. After illustrating the behavior using a diagram she started seeing the pattern. But the bigger question, why did she need to prove herself to everyone? We discovered that that’s what she believed she needed to do to get attention from adults, but even then, she rarely got any. She realized by proving herself she was going against her own will for a benefit she never got.
She destroyed one belief at a time and slowly started feeling better about herself. She started identifying with values and strengths. She challenged what she believed about her abilities and took on a full time job. With each success her self-confidence boosted giving her a desire for more. She even started going to the gym and working out 3x week with a trainer and goes on her own 2x week.
I am proud of her. She is weaning off medication, down to half of what she was taking when we first met and continues weaning under the supervision of her physician. She no longer believes that she is a stupid, lazy procrastinator. She has goals and plans to achieve them. And she reestablished a healthy relationship with her family.
The Dual Sting of Depression and Anxiety – Involuntary Defeat Strategy (IDS)
For anyone who has ever felt the dual sting of both depression and anxiety, you know that there is a link between the two in many instances. It makes sense that, if an individual has experienced the rejection and defeat that contributes to depression, they will ultimately experience anxiety in regards to confronting the sources of that depression. There are many ways to label this connection, but the basic premise is simple – the more severe the depression, the higher level the anxiety ultimately reaches.
There is a difference however in what kinds of depression can cause this sort of reaction. For some people, depression can be caused by their attachments. Having a fight with a loved one or breaking up with a long time partner can be a source of depression that is debilitating but not always in a manner that breeds higher levels of anxiety. However, depression directly attributed to one’s perception of social ranking can often be directly tied to the development of anxiety.
What this means is that this high level depression is caused by a feeling of inadequacy and inferiority within a given social environment. The individual is made to feel submissive and defeated in a social competition – whether it is losing a spouse to another man or woman, losing a job to a coworker, or being upstaged by a persistently more successful sibling. This feeling of defeat compounds and, due to the inherent hierarchy that exists in any social interaction, people start to judge or rate each other. Worse yet, those that suffer from depression assume they are being judged and rated, even when they are not, and start to develop high levels of anxiety about what their friends and family think of them and how they will react to almost every decision made.
Recent studies have gone on to show that this form of anxiety is unique in that it is directly related to the way in which you interact with those around you. One in particular – that of David Zuroff from the University of Toronto – states that when people gather in a group of essentially any form an immediate hierarchy develops. This hierarchy and the ranking of each individual within that hierarchy can then be measured based on their level of low positive effect – a term referring to the depression they have experienced as a result of defeat, rejection, or losses in a social setting. The comparison was drawn between this low positive effect level and the ability of the individual to hold attention and attraction in their peers through respect, influence, likeability, and other social prominent factors.
The study went on to show that the lower a person is within the social hierarchy of a given group, the higher the level of depression they may suffer from, and the more anxiety they will develop as a result – feeling trapped within the social environment and overwhelmed by those they feel are better than them. Rather than confronting this perception, they retreat within themselves, hiding from outside sources due to a perceived or very real lack of support from their family, friends, and peers.
Zuroff’s study is based upon a theory known as IDS or Involuntary Defeat Strategy (Gilbert, 2000; Sloman, 2000) which basically states that depression is directly caused by an activation of an instinct that keeps defeated individuals from attempting possibly dangerous contests with rivals that are superior. This social rank competition theory means that a great deal of depression is caused simply by individuals not being able to terminate this IDS reflex in their brains at the end of a social competition. They continue to allow the effects of losing a job or breaking up someone to affect how they perceive and interact with the world.
Millions of people attempt each day to overcome social pressures and be an important part of the social hierarchy. Those that can overcome their depression by working with those around them and terminating the self-defeating behavior our brains attempt to instill when we fail, will not only be able to operate free of much of the social anxiety they experience – they will quickly rise to the top of the social rankings.
Want to learn more about Involuntary Defeat Strategy?
Bruno LoGreco Master Life Coach, Toronto Canada.
When You Suffocate The True You
Do you ever wonder if the life you lead is really your life? Is your life lacking: Intention, purpose, and goals? Is your childhood dream a past memory? Are you feeling suppressed, depressed and misunderstood? Do you suppress your true feelings? Do you feel disconnected from the person you know lives inside of you? Are you living your life or… the life of another person?
If you answered ‘Yes” to all seven questions it could mean that you are living another person’s life – their intentions and goals. At some point in your life, you unconsciously took on the intention and goals of another person, typically an influencer. The life you once dreamed of is probably different then the one you are living and it’s creating a conflict within you. The end result: stress and depression.
Ask yourself what “suppression” means? Do you know what it means? It means to suppress – voluntary or involuntary, direct restraint on the expression of an instinct. This could happen if you are trying to deal with a situation. You abandon your true self and assume the intentions and goals of another person. This could also happen out of good intention too. Essentially you suffocate the true you, you give up your freewill and power to choose.
So what happened or happens when you suppress your true self:
• You suppress your true intention and goals and you assume another’s identity.
• You resist and create a new identity, but not that of your true self.
• Or you maintain your integrity by being your true self, which implies taking responsibility and acting according to your own identity – Your true intentions and goals.
But, whether you suppress or whether you resist, if there is a direct restraint on the expression of an instinct you will generate emotional charges throughout your life until it is resolved.
Suppression Exercise:
- Become aware when you are around people, which make you feel bad. Notice when you are feeling limited or muted. Write down the scenario – people, conversation, and feelings.
- Become aware of when you are around positive people, which make you feel good, and help you feel better about true self. Write down the scenario –people, conversation and feelings.
- Review the specific reasons why you were left feeling bad or good in each environment. Write down your thoughts and feelings.
- Write your intentions – Likes, dislikes, purposes and goals that are being suppressed?
- Who is suppressing your true self?
- Are you suppressing your own feeling–but originally suppressed by the actions of another person?
- Is your past a present day issue?
The truth behind your current situation will help you free your true expression, your natural instinct for your life. Learn how to be free.
How To Avoid an Episode of Depression
Do you want to avoid experiencing an episode of depression?
The easiest and most effective way to limit your exposure to depression is to nurture your mind, body, and soul.
Often time an episode of depression is triggered by lack of sleep. A person might not realize that with each passing day their bodies do not get the required amount of sleep, it slowly wears them down. Over a period of time, their mind slowly begins to shut down leaving the person fatigued throughout their day, making simple decisions complex challenges. If you are sleeping less than seven hours nightly, consider adjusting your sleeping patterns to include between seven and eight hours of sleep.
Once you start sleeping properly you will feel more energized and physically able to take a walk or check out the local gym for a good physical or cardiovascular workout. A good physical routine should consist of 3 to 4 days a week, between 20 and 40 minutes, whether its walking or weight training. A proper physical routine combined with a proper sleeping regiment will reduce your chances of experiencing an episode of depression, especially during the winter months.
With a good sleeping pattern and a physical activity, a healthy eating habit should be considered for optimal performance. Fueling your body with proper nutrition, from breakfast to dinner, including drinking enough water through out your day is equally important as your sleep and physical activity.
To avoid an episode of depression the easiest and most effective way is to sleep between seven and eight hours, exercise and eat well.
Bruno LoGreco a Toronto Life Coach
Involuntary Defeat Strategy (IDS)
Often times, depression and anxiety can be closely linked to one another. A person whom experienced losses, defeat, or rejection in their past (low positive effect), will likely also experience anxiety (high negative effect). The more sever the depression, the higher the anxiety. Low depression is attributed to attachments, while higher levels of depression are contributed to social ranking.
A person with low positive effect will feel inferior to his or her peers within the same social environment, feeling submissive and often times defeated in any social competition. That’s because in any social competition a hierarchy does exists–peers rating and perceiving each other.
A study completed by a professor at the University of Toronto showed that any time people come together in a group, a hierarchy will exist, and the ranking of each person becomes predictable, based on the people with lowest positive effect. Predictability was based on the ability for a person to hold positive attraction–how prominent, respected, influential, a person is–how likable are they?
The lower on the social ranking a person is, the higher the level of depression they may experience–feeling anxious, trapped and unable to escape from their social environment, retreating to themselves with no support from family, friends or peers, feeling a sense of rejection.
IDS is the social rank competition theory (Gilbert, 2000; Sloman, 2000) which contributes depression to the inability for a person to terminate IDS at the end of a social rank competition. Everyday millions of North American’s deal with the social pressures of society and fight to be part of and or hold a position in their social environment.
Overcome depression by getting along with those around you and in time you too will get ahead and on top of the social rank.
Bruno LoGreco Master Life Coach and Mentor - Life Coach Toronto
Midlife Crisis
One of the first tasks I complete whenever I begin to work with a new client is to learn as much as I can about them. I spend time with my client understanding who they are, and what makes them tic. I ask many questions about who they are, but unaware to them, each question I ask has two purposes and sometimes three. One of the first questions I ask my client is to tell me about who they are. The purpose of the question is pretty obvious, but the second purpose is to understand if they are identified with what they do, their jobs. Three out of five times, the answer will begin with what they do professionally, starting with the title. I am a “Marketing Executive” and I work for XYZ World Wide.
Try it for yourself the next time you meet-up with an old friend that you have not seen in a number of years. Ask them what they’ve been up to since you last saw each other. Listen to what they have to say and notice if they talk about what they enjoy doing other than work, if they mention anything at all.
Midlife Crisis: An emotional crisis of identity and self-confidence that can occur in early middle age.
Does a person whom becomes identified to his or her career become a candidate to experience midlife crisis?
Any number of life situations can trigger a crisis, aging, menopause, death of parents, children leaving home. In one study, less than 10% of people experienced midlife crises, due to their age or aging. In another study, it showed that some cultures are more exposed to experience midlife crisis than others. Middle-aged adults experience life events that caused added stress, or even depression in their life. However, it was reported that those events can happen anytime throughout a person’s life, and will not necessarily be the contributing factor to a midlife crisis.
So what really does trigger a “midlife crisis”, and are North American’s more susceptible to experience a midlife crisis than the rest of the world?
Have you identified your life to your career? Find out by contacting Bruno LoGreco, an International Master Life Coach Toronto
Depression
Living in fear, stress, and anxiety is no picnic for any person. A person with a chattering mind that draws on the past negative experiences, fuels their emotions as they think about how to deal with their current situation, and play it out in their chattering mind, over and over again, inflicting the person with severe anxiety about the future.
A report that was published by Time, on August 9, 2004, based on a survey of 200,000 Americans, showed Americans experienced symptoms of depression, sadness, or blueness, on average three days in any given month. Women and teenagers are more likely to experience symptoms of depression, hurt, guilt, or just blue. Underweight women are more likely to experience depression than overweight women, and men and seniors have a lower risk of experiencing symptoms of depression. 17 millions Americans, suffer from symptoms of depression annual. In Canada 9.6% of the population will experience a depression episode lasting one year or more, in the United States, 5.2% will experience a depression episode lasting one year or more.
How often do you experience depression and why?
Depression is not genetically caused, although some cases have been reported, depression is largely caused by a person’s environment. I describe “Environmental Noise” in an article I wrote, The Success Indicators on Your Life Path. Contributing factors to depression are, isolation, lack of friends and family support, self-confliction and the largest contributing factor is a feeling of not belonging.
A person that feels that they do not belong will have friends from a broad range of different social networks, friends in many cities and other countries, and has moved two or more times in their early adolescent and or teenage life, from one school to another, city-to-city, or country-to-country. A person that feels they do not belong will consider moving to a new city in hopes of a better life, only to discover the new city does not bring any sense of belonging either. The more common but less sever symptoms of depression are caused by a person’s current situation, immediate influencers, colleagues, subordinates, families, and lets not forget, the winter season, that too is also considered environmental.
Symptoms of depression should be treated, especially for teenagers experiencing symptoms of depression, due in part of a physical move. For others, carrying the weight of guilt on their shoulders, reliving the past and getting a feeling of satisfaction momentarily, will send a person into an episode of depression, lasting decades if left untreated.
Both Depression and Anxiety can be treated without medication. A professional Life Coach or Counselor could determine if further treatment in addition to support is required. In both cases, turning off the chatting in the brain, about the past or the future is all that is needed to recognize where all the chatting comes from, and that is enough for the person to begin the process of self-awareness and healing.
Bruno LoGreco Life Coach Toronto
